It's funny how your mind can tell you one thing and you KNOW you should believe it...but you're heart so desperately believes something completely opposite! and for some reason you always trust your heart...even if it hurts and even if you KNOW it's wrong...I do this ALL the time. in fact I did today! I am always the type to see the best in the people, even people who really hurt me...well, not ALWAYS, but usually. and today something smacked me in the face and said "THIS PERSON IS NOT PERFECT. THIS PERSON WILL NEVER STOP HURTING YOU. GET OUT!" Like all the good, wonderful things I have rehearsed in my brain, all the good in saw in him....gone. just like that. Because some people will always hurt you. It's just the sad truth. and I am unfortunately a common victim for those kind of people. probably because I am so forgiving. I have a target on my head apparently. But today it was very clear. Clear that I HAD to move on. Stop the fantasizing. Stop it all. And you know, this blog is probably a broken record to a lot of people as they watch me re-live my mistakes over and over...but this is the process of healing sometimes. It can be very repetitive and long. But I know it will be worth it when I come out of this in one piece. That's the beauty of faith. I don't HAVE to be broken. My Savior offers me restoration! Some people have permanent scars and wounds...I will never have that, because I have a healer that never gives up on me!
