I saw your face today and it practically killed me. Something about those brown eyes that drives me insane...like I thought I moved past you, but every time I'm drawn back in, like some unseen motion. That little smirk, and your tall, easy gate. It just does something inside me and no matter how many times i scream NO, i still come back again. It's my sickness. I'm perpetually lying to myself and it's such a dangerous cycle. I come out and I breathe for two seconds before I'm sucked back in and is it bad to say I dream of you? Is it bad to say I'm constantly wondering..."what if" and then I think "but if I..." and "what about you?" and then I'm just racing around in circles trying to cover up my tracks, so when you wake up you won't know I was there. You won't even realize how hung up on you I've been for so very long. But then I guess destiny has a different plan! It always does. I plan everything out, even down to the last speck of dust, and then destiny comes in like a whirlwind, whipping apart everything I had so carefully pieced together. Destiny doesn't like my way. But I like your way. I always have. But I'm pretty sure you've always been blind to that. That's the worst part. Being an unknown lover.
Who knows what I'm even writing! Half of it comes to me on impulse, while the other half is cautiously worded and illustrated...but in the end it's just a plea. A plea to be heard.
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